LUGNET News : ~1701/04Aug02


Fiona Dickinson / 04Aug02

Brickbury Herald 4th August 2002 Late Edition

Brickbury is set to get a Sheriff’s Department in the coming few days, a council spokesperson said in a statement earlier today. ‘Every good town needs one’ said Mayor Autissier ‘especially when the great town planner in the sky has so many minifigs in police uniform.’

The main job of the Sheriff’s Department will be to help cats out of trees ( a job normally reserved for the elite fire brigade), help old ladies cross the road and to keep the consumption of donuts in Brickbury high.

It is belived that the Sheriff’s Department will have personnel dedicated to police, paramedic and fire duties. Mayor Autissier continued with ‘As nothing bad happens here we don’t really need any emergency dervices, but we don’t want to miss out on anything, do we hey? Let the party begin’ cheers.’

Residents again partied away both day and night in the celebrations.

If you are looking for a career in the emergency services contact Captain Blake Brakeworth who can usually be found eating donuts at the snak stop in the market. Aplicants should have a resonable head for heights, a liking of small furry animals and no objection to running out to collect the never ending supply of donuts. It also helps if the applicant likes the apple donuts as they are the ones nobody else likes. ‘Remember what is hard work and long hours elsewhere is a really easy job in Brickbury.’

We at the Herald would like to offer our most heartfelt congratulations to local lass Ashleigh Fletcher, who was awarded her PhD in chemistry yesterday, from ULT (University of Legoworld at Tableleg). Her thesis entitled ‘How To Work Really Hard For Three Years, Be Under Apreciated But Generally Wonderful: A Look Into the Chemical Reality of Brickstien Krystalinium Compounds’ is considered to be one of best pieces of scientific work in recent years.

Ashleigh first found fame last week by designing Brickbury’s first park. She is set to start work at ULB (University of Legoworld at Brickbury) as soon as the research labs are built. We wish her every success.

Primary content in this document is © Fiona Dickinson. All other text, images, or trademarks in this document are the intellectual property of their respective owners.